Avery Johnson/Quotes

Halo: Combat Evolved

Scripted Dialog

• "You heard the lady! Move like you've got a purpose!"
• "Men, keep your eyes downrange, fingers on the triggers, and we all come home in one piece. Am I right, Marines?" - Johnson's speech on Easy.
• "Once again, it is our job to finish what the flyboys started. We are leaving this ship's platoon, and engaging the Covenant on solid ground. When we meet the enemy, you will rip their skulls from their spines, and toss 'em away, laughin'! Am I right, Marines?" - Johnson's speech on Normal.
• "Men, here is where we show those split-chin, squid-head, sons of bitches that they could not have picked a worse enemy than the human race. We are going to blow the hell out of those dumb bugs until we don't have anything left to shoot 'em with! And then, we are going to strangle them with their own living guts! Am I right, Marines?" - Johnson's speech on Heroic.
• "Men, we led those dumb bugs out to the middle of nowhere to keep 'em from gettin' their filthy claws on Earth. But, we stumbled onto somethin' they're so hot for, that they're scramblin' over each other to get it. Well, I don't care if it's God's own anti-son-of-a-bitch machine, or a giant hula hoop, we're not gonna let 'em have it! What we will let 'em have is a belly full of lead, and a pool of their own blood to drown in! Am I right, Marines?" -Johnson's speech on Legendary.
• "All you greenhorns who wanted to see Covenant up close... this is your lucky day."
• "It's a mess, sir. We're scattered all over this valley. We called for evac, but until you showed up, I thought we were cooked." - To the Master Chief on the level Halo.
• "Hit it, Marines—go, go, go! The Corps ain't payin' us by the hour!" - Beginning of Truth and Reconciliation(level), right after the cut-scene.
• "Don't even THINK about it, Marine!" - To Mendoza, who had just shouted "This is loco!" upon encountering the Flood.
• "Goddamnit Jenkins, fire your weapon!" - The cutscene in 343 Guilty Spark.

Legendary Ending

• "C'mere you mother... I'm gonna... Grr... Ah!" - Struggling with an Elite for Assault Rifle.
• "Oh, shi—" - When the Pillar of Autumn started to explode.
• "This is it, baby. Hold me." - To the Elite, who hugs him.

When exiting the Halo Trial

• "So. You beat the Halo demo. Not bad, soldier, not bad at all. But are you ready to take the next step?! In the full version of Halo, you'll find additional vehicles like tanks, plasma turrets, and aircraft: powerful, new human and alien weapons; a single player campaign spanning ten massive indoor and outdoor environments; and support for intense multiplayer battles with up to sixteen of your friends! ... Or enemies. All that wrapped up in an epic sci-fi story that's so freaky, it makes me shake just thinkin' about it. Halo: Combat Evolved. Buy one! Heck, buy two. That's an order, soldier!"

Random Phrases

• "Get up, SO I CAN KILL YOU AGAIN!" - Shooting the enemy's corpse.
• "Roadkill!" - After splattering an enemy.
• "Why me...?" - Stuck by Plasma Grenade.
• "School is now in session!"
• "Theres no stopping me!"
• "Say hello to my little friend!"
• "Leave some for me!" -After the Chief kills some enemies.
• "You mind not killing my men?!" - When you kill a Marine.
• "You monkeys almost look like soldiers there!" - To the Marines.
• "I'm proud of you, Marines!" - After a Marine scores a kill.
• "Marines, we are going to aid Master Chief after he just saved your sorry asses!" - Assault on the Control Room.
• "Ah, man, I just had the thing washed!" - After splattering an enemy.
• "You're almost a man!" - After you or a Marine kills something.
• "Who's the man?" (Marine says- "You are!")
• "Thank you!" - After Johnson kills a Sangheili or Unggoy.
• "Just you and me now." - After all marines nearby have been killed.
• "One down, 50 billion to go!" - After killing Covenant infantry.
• "Do I owe you money?! " - After being shot/meleed by the player.
• "Sorry, soldier" -After shooting a Marine.
• "Don't get cocky!"
• "Where are your glasses, boy?"- After shooting Marines or him.
• "Stop whining!"
• "We did bring enough ammo to kill these things!" - Referring to the Flood on the level 343 Guilty Spark as you're running to reach the structure
• "No peeking!"
• "Headshot!" -After killing an enemy (with/without a headshot).
• "We could use your help, sir!"
• "I'm too pretty to die!"
• "Don't make me take off my belt!"
• "I would have been your daddy but the dog beat me over the fence!" - This line is referenced numerously throughout the series, and Sergeant Stacker can use it as well.
• "Earth isn't going to save itself, Chief, it's time to step up to the plate, are you, or are you not going to finish the fight?" - Later used as Halo 3's tag line.
• "Lets go!" -When getting in a Warthog.
• "Fan out and search!" -When searchng for an enemy.
• "Al quiet" -When not spotting an enemy for a while.
• "Punch it!" -After getting in a Warthog.
• "Covering fire!"
• "I can't get a clear shot!" -When the player stands in his way.
• "Move!" -After getting out of a Warthog.
• "Get out of my way!" -When the player stands in his way.
• "Get the lead out Marines!"
• "Hey, move your ass!" -When the player stands in his way.
• "Triggers down, men!"
• "Sorry about that sir" -After he shoots Master Chief.
• "Can't run..." -After killing a running enemy.
• "Next" -After killing an enemy.
• "Come on!"
• "Keep it up!" -When the player or a Marine kills one or more enemies.
• "Its down!" -After killing an enemy.
• "We showed them" -After he and his squad win a fight.
• "Nice shot!" .
• "Here comes more!" -When he spots an enemy.
• "Target down!" -After killing an enemy
• "Wich one of you freaks is next?!"
• "What the..?"
• "Over here" -When he spots an enemy.
• "Die!" -When trying to kill an enemy.
• "Want some more?!" -After killing an enemy.
• "One alien down" -After killing an enemy.
• "There it is" -When he spots an enemy.
• "Good shooting!" -When the player or a Marine kills one or more enemies.
• "Didnt even see me!" -After killing an enemy
• "Can't hide from me!" -When he spots an enemy.
• "Firing!" -When trying to kill an enemy.
• "Anyone see him?" -After not seeing an enemy for a while.
• "Whats wrong with you?" -After the Chief kills a Marine.
• "Somebody call Keyes and tell him what happened" -After the Chief is dead.
• "You nuts?"
• "That's it, you are dead!" -After the player starts team killing.
• "There's more where that came from"
• "He's gone rampant!" -After the player starts team killing.
• "Nailed him" -After killing an enemy
• "Take that, bastard!" -After killing an enemy
• "I'm on your side!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Gaaaahhh!" -When he is meleed by the player.
• "Stop!" -After the player melees him.
• "Go go go!" -After getting out of a Warthog.
• "Careful" -After the player melees him.
• "Pile out!" -After getting out of a Warthog.
• "Watch it marine" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Everybody out!" -After getting out of a Warthog.
• "Clean your visor" -After the player melees him.
• "Ease up son!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Move it, move it! -After getting out of a Warthog.
• "Showtime!" -After getting in a Warthog.
• "Lets go!" -After getting in a Warthog.
• "Floor it!" -After getting in a Warthog.
• "Cut it out soldier" -After the player melees him.
• "Hold your fire!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Real good, jackass!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "What the hell?!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Watch your fire, boy" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "What the...?!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Check your targets marines" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Hey...!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Point that thing somewhere else!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Bastard!" -After killing an enemy.
• "Its me!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Where are your glasses, boy?!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Sorry" -After he shoots you.
• "Try aiming that weapon" After the player melees/shoots him.
• "You are all gonna DIE!" -After he is shot and has very little health left.
• "Nothing over here" -After not seeing an enemy for a while.
• "Cease fire!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Whats wrong with you, boy?!" -After the player melees/shoots him.
• "Make them count" -When he kills an enemy.
• "Covenant bastard!" -When he kills an enemy.
• "Let me get that for you!"
• "Rot in HELL!'
• "Slow it down!" When you drive a Warthog off a cliff.
• "That will do him" -When he kills an enemy.
• "Don't bother getting up" -When he kills an enemy.
• "Class dismissed" -When he kills an enemy.
• "Whoooaaaaaaa!" -When falling from a great distance.
• "Thats how you do it, boys!" -When he kills an enemy.
• "Alright..!" -When he kills an enemy.
• "I love this JOB!" -When he kills an enemy.
• "That can't be all of them?"
• "Are you bored?!" -When you teamkill.
• "How that feel?!" -When you betray him and he starts shooting you.
• "That is a guaranteed court-martial when we get back to earth, soldier" -When a Marine kills an ally with a grenade (even himself).
• "We are FUBAR." -When the Chief dies.
• "Follow me, Marines!"
• "BAAAAAM!" -When killing an enemy with a grenade.
• That's how you do it, boys"
• "Nice throw!" -After the player or an ally kills an enemy with a grenade.
• "You are dead!"
• "Show me what you got!"
• "Who wants a piece of me?!"
• "Get cool boy!" -After the player kills an ally.
• "Holy crap!" -When the player kills an enemy with a Plasma grenade.
• "Look at them fly" -When an enemy is killed by a grenade.
• "You are not getting away with that!" -After the player starts team killing.
• "You are not getting away with THAT!" -After the player starts team killing.
• "Kill that S.O.B. -After the player starts team killing.
• "Get him, he's a traitor" -After the player starts team killing.
• "Get him, he's crazy!" -After the player starts team killing.
• "Get him, men" -After the player starts team killing.
• "Die, traitor!" -After the player starts team killing.
• "Take him out, marines!" -After the player starts team killing.
• "Should i feel good about that?" -After he kills the player who teamkilled.
• "Well, on to plan B" -After he kills the player who teamkilled.
• "Take that, traitor!" -After he kills the player who teamkilled.
• "Stupid, stupid, stupid!" -After he kills the player who teamkilled.
• "Lousy piece of crap!" -After he kills the player who teamkilled.
• "What went wrong?" -After he kills the player who teamkilled.
• "Only one thing left to say..." -After he kills the player who teamkilled.
• "Come out where i can see you" -When an enemy is hiding.
• "I know it's around here, somewhere" -When an enemy is hiding.
• "I will trust you, for now" -After he trusts a player who has teamkilled.
• "I know you are there" -When an enemy is hiding.
• "I don't want an more trouble from you" -After he trusts a player who has teamkilled.
• "Damn, i lost him" -When an enemy is hiding.
• "Where did he go?" -When an enemy is hiding.
• "I'm keeping my eye on you?" -After he trusts a player who has teamkilled.
• "Come out where I can see you!" -When an enemy is hiding.
• "Don't try that again!" -After he trusts a player who has teamkilled.
• "AAHH?" -When hearing a gunshot while idle.
• "WHOA!" -When hearing a gunshot while idle.
• "What the...?" -When hearing a gunshot while idle.
• "AYYYY...!" -When stuck by a Plasma Grenade.
• "Are you trying to kill us?!" -When the player throws a Grenade near him.
• "AH..AHH...YAAA!" -When stuck by a Plasma Grenade.
• "Get it off....someone get it off!" -When stuck by a Plasma Grenade.
• "YYAAA...!" -When stuck by a Plasma Grenade.
• "UU..AAAA!" -When stuck by a Plasma Grenade.

Halo 2

Scripted Lines

• "That, or you can hide behind me. You done with my boy here Master Guns? I don't see any training wheels." -After training.
• "Sorry Guns, classified." -In response to the Master Gunnery Sergeant's inquiry.
• "Well, he's in a particularly fine mood. Maybe Lord Hood didn't give him an invitation." - To the Master Chief, entering the tram car.
• "Earth... Haven't seen it in years. When I shipped out for Basic, the orbital defense grid was all theory and politics. Now look! The Cairo is just one of three hundred geosync platforms. That MAC gun can put a round clean through a Covenant capital ship. With coordinated fire from the Athens and the Malta, nothing's getting past this battle cluster in one piece. Ships have been arriving all morning. Nobody's saying much, but I think something big's about to happen." - In the tram car.
• "And you told me you were gonna wear something nice." - In response to John-117 complaining about cameras on the Cairo station.
• "Folks need heroes chief, to give 'em hope, so smile would ya, while we still got something to smile about!" - Heretic Cutscene.
• "For a brick, he flew pretty good." - Ending cut-scene of Cairo Station after the bomb detonates.
• "If you want to keep your brain inside your head, I'd tell those boys to chill!" - To Tartarus in the Great Journey cut-scene.
• "Dear Humanity... We regret being alien bastards. We regret coming to Earth. And we most definitely regret that the Corps just blew up our raggedy-ass fleet!" - Opening cut-scene of Outskirts.
• "We're going in!"
• "Oh, I know what the ladies like..." - To Cortana when she thanks him for bringing her and the Master Chief a tank... and while cocking an M-247. Opening cut-scene of Metropolis.
• "I heard that, jackass!" - In response to a Marine on Delta Halo.
• "*Grunts* You know, your father never asked me for help, either!" - To Miranda Keyes after she retrieves the Index at the Library at the end of Quarantine Zone.
• "Listen, you don't like me, and I sure as hell don't like you. But if we don't do something, Mr. Mohawk's gonna activate this ring, and we're all gonna die." - To the Arbiter, while piloting a Scarab, during The Great Journey.
• "Please... don't shake the lightbulb!" - Referring to 343 Guilty Spark in The Great Journey.
• "Well, I just happen to have a key! Come on, grab a Banshee and give me some cover. He's gonna know we're comin'." - Near the end of The Great Journey (Level), when he is told that Tartarus has locked himself in the control room on Delta Halo and happens to be commandeering a Scarab.
• "Hey, bastard! Knock! Knock!" - Towards the end of The Great Journey (Level) when he blows open the control room on Delta Halo with a Scarab
• "Hang tight, ma'am, not until that Brute is dead!" - Telling Keyes to wait until the Arbiter killed Tartarus before removing the Index
• "Listen Tinker Bell, don't make me...." Johnson to 343 guilty spark during the Great Journey

Gameplay Quotes

• "If you didn't want your ass shot off, you shouldn't have stuck it out so far" - After shooting enemy on Outskirts.
• "Yes, we know I'm pretty, but we gotta get back to work." - After being stared at for a period of time.
• "That hurts, Chief. That hurts real bad." - When you take his Sniper Rifle.
• "I'm not your daddy." - When you take his Sniper Rifle.
• "I thought we were friends."-When you take his Sniper Rifle.
• "Don't make me take off my belt!"
• "Don't touch my belt!" (After saying the top phrase)
• "Don't look at me, look at them!" - When being stared at in the opening battle on Outskirts.
• "Thank you." - If you give him his sniper rifle back.
• "You do know I was kicking ass with that?" - When you swap weapons with him.
• "I thought we were friends!" - When you take his Sniper Rifle.
• "Very funny, Cortana. Now turn him back on." - If the Master Chief stares at him for too long.
• "Do I look like an eight-foot-tall alien monster?." - If you shoot or melee him.
• "Chief you are suppose to be setting an example!" - If you shoot or melee him.
• "Chief, you've been through worse." - If the Master Chief dies.
• "I'm too pretty to die!" - If he is stuck with a Plasma Grenade.
• "I don't wanna kill ya, you're just too ugly to let live!".
• "Looks like your freaky, little mouth just bit off more than it could chew!"- to a Grunt on the level, Outskirts.
• "Don't they teach you kids how to swear in basic any more?!" - Outskirts Normal.
• "Don't make me rip your arms off and beat you to death with them!" When a Grunt yells "Monkey!"
• "I knew we were friends but DAMN!" - When given a good weapon, particularly a sniper rifle.
• "You okay with this, Cortana?" - When given a good weapon.
• "We got Jackals in the courtyard!"
• "Come on Arbiter, kick that guy's ass!" - Supporting the Arbiter when fighting Tartarus.
• "Who's the Man?"

(To himself) "You are!" "THANK YOU!" In response to himself

• "If it were anybody else..." - If you take his sniper rifle.

Metropolis Speeches

"You had your chance to be afraid before you joined my beloved Corps! But, to guide you back to the true path, I brought this motivational device! Our big green style cannot be defeated!"

— Easy

"The Chief is gonna jump in this tank, roll across the bridge, and blow up any inhuman son-of-a-bitch dumb enough to get between him and the Prophet of Regret! Pull yourself together, 'cause you're going with him."

— Normal

"When I joined the Corps, we didn't have any fancy-schmanzy tanks. We had sticks! Two sticks, and a rock for the whole platoon—and we had to share the rock! Buck up, boy, you are one very lucky marine!"

— Heroic

"Usually, the good Lord works in mysterious ways. But not today! This here is 66 tons of straight-up, H.E-spewing dee-vine intervention! If God is love, then you can call me 'Cupid'!"

— Legendary

Halo 3

Scripted Dialogue

• "Radio for evac. Heavy lift gear, but we're not leaving him here."
• "'What's an aspect ratio?' It's the shape and proportion of your screen, fool!" - On the AV Calibration tool.
• "Crazy fool... why do you always jump?! One of these days, you're gonna land on something as stubborn as you are. And I don't do bits and pieces..." - to the Master Chief at the beginning of Halo 3.
• "Take off the training wheels, he's good to go."
• "Come on, you dumb apes! If you want breakfast, you gotta catch it!" - to pursuing Brutes on Sierra 117.
• "Send me out... with a bang." - To the Master Chief; Johnson's last words.
• "Kick his ass." - to the Master Chief after he hands over the Spartan Laser to help defeat 343 Guilty Spark.
• "Don't let her go... don't ever let her go." - to the Master Chief about Cortana.
• "What's the matter, big shot? Can't start your own party?" - When Truth needs him to activate The Ark.
• "This isn't as fun as it looks. Cut the power!" - When held prisoner behind a Covenant energy field.
• Johnson can sometimes be heard humming Flight of the Valkyries by Richard Wagner when Forward Unto Dawn comes down on the Ark.
• "Do you or do you not want to finish the fight?" - If you don't get on the Pelican at the end of Sierra 117, a reference to Halo 3's tagline.
• "We're even, long as we're only countin' today. Kilo023, what's your ETA?" After being rescued by Master Chief.
• "Roger that Hocus, Friendly gunship coming in hot!"-To marines
• "Hocus! Phantom!"-To hocus pointing out a phantom.

Sierra 117 quotes

The cut-scene at the beginning of Sierra 117 in Halo 3 has several variations, and it is not yet known exactly which settings cause which

• "Then they must love the smell of green." - At the beginning of Sierra 117, on Normal/Easy difficulty.
• "Then they must love the smell of hero." - At the beginning of Sierra 117, on Heroic difficulty.
• "Then they must love the smell of badass." - At the beginning of Sierra 117, on Legendary difficulty.
• "Then they must love the smell of Testosterone!" Legendary, IWHBYD

• "Then they must love the smell of badass. And I left a little present for you Arbiter, I'm walking away! Ha-ha!" - Legendary. IWHBYD
• "Then they must love the smell of a real man." - Legendary. IWHBYD
• "Then they must love the smell of Bulgari. Yeah, that's right I'm doing a little bit of product placement. I gotta get paid too!" - Legendary. IWHBYD

Random Quotes

• "Ain't I supposed to be immune to this?"- If infected by the Flood.
• "Hey Luke Duke, slow it down!" - If you drive a warthog badly.
• "Friggin tourists!"

Halo 3: ODST

Scripted Dialog

Epilogue

• "Don't worry...I know what the aliens like."
• "It has access to the Covenant battle-net?"
• "The Brutes. The bastards who put bombs on your buddies and killed millions of my people...they're digging a mighty big hole. You're gonna tell me exactly what they're looking for. And then, you're gonna help me stop 'em."

Halo 3: ODST Firefight ViDoc Trailer

• "Welcome to New Mombasa."
• "Bip, bap, bam!"
• "This is Firefight. And we need every able body we can get. Even yours."
• "You boys can thank me later, right now I got selling to do...lucky for you, your squad is the best of the best: Orbital Drop Shock Troopers."
• "Problem is we got alien bastards in our house. Each new wave means more bad guys. 5 waves make up a round. 3 rounds in a set. Sounds easy huh? WRONG!"
• "See these skulls? When they activate, they turn a casual Covenant make out session, into a full on test of your manly prowess."
• "Catch, makes the enemy toss grenades like it's going out of style."
• "Black Eye, only way your getting health back is by punching an alien in the chin."
• "And the others...well, let's just say that they call them difficulty multipliers for a reason."
• "But, as long as your feeling cooperative, there's no need to go it alone. Get cozy with up to four players over System Link or Xbox Live and Firefight with your friends through ten battlefields all over New Mombasa."
  
• "Well, it's not just about greasing bad guys. Sometimes, it's all about the glory. Put your boot up enough alien backside and the corps will pin rows of medals on your chest. Might even get some achievements, too. Bad ass, unlocked."
  
• "Now, I know what your thinking: 'Sergent Major Johnson, these sound like overwhelming odds. I don't want to drop into hell without an air tight insurance policy!'"
  
• "Well, do I have an offer for you! Pre-order your copy of Halo 3: ODST at participating retailers now and you'll get all the confidence you'll need: ME!"
  
• "Ha ha, that's right. The toughest, cigar chompest marine there is, yours to play in Firefight."
  
• (To squad) Here we go, next wave coming in! This is going to get hot!"

Books

• "The Flood? Hell, Chief, it's going to take more than that pack of walking alien horror-show freaks to take out Sergeant A. J. Johnson!"
• "Those Covenant sissies are going to have to tango with me before they set one foot in this room!"
• "That doesn't look like an Uneven Elephant to me: looks more like two squids kissing."
• "Help me with the lady, she weighs more than your last girlfriend."
• Corporal Locklear: "Just shoot me now, Sarge, and get it over with. Don't torture me with that crap first."

Sergeant Johnson: "Suck it up, Marine. This is a classic."

Corporal Locklear: "So's a mercy killing."

• "You better get it together, Marine, or the Chief'll reach down and pull you inside out by your corn hole. And that'll be a sweet, sweet mercy... compared to what I'm gonna do to you." To Corporal Locklear after insulting Spartan 117.