Editing Axon Clips Chapter 2

{{era|ILB}}
{{AxonClips}}

'''Axon Clips Chapter 2''' is the second chapter in the [[I love bees|I Love Bees]] audio drama. It takes place during the third week of August, [[2552]].<ref>Each chapter is a week apart, and the last chapter includes the start of the Covenant invasion of Earth: a verifiable date.</ref>
=="The Red Button" ([[Kamal Zaman|Kamal]])==
*[http://transmit.ilovebees.com/surveillance_archive/week2_subject3.wav Kamal Audio Compilation 9min 37sec]

===Cute Little Caps===
{{Listen|title=Cute Little Caps
|filename=cute_little_caps.ogg
}}
''(chatter beeps repeatedly)''<br />
'''[[Kamal Zaman|Kamal]]:''' Dammit!<br />
'''[[Hiroyuki|Hiro]]:''' That's like the seventh time today you've refused to answer your [[chatter]]. I'd say it was your mother...<br />
'''Kamal:''' My mother is 42 light years away.<br />
'''Hiro:''' ...except you'd never dare not answer your mother. Bill collectors, perhaps, or immigration?<br />
'''Kamal:''' Dammit!<br />
'''Hiro:''' Or you've been breaking hearts in the nursing dorms, haven't you? ''(walks to the window)'' If I look out the window here, I bet I see like four of them, standing outside in short skirts and those cute little caps, just waiting.<br />
'''Kamal:''' You need a girlfriend.<br />
'''Hiro:''' We both need girlfriends.<br />

===Pony Tail===
{{Listen|title=Pony Tail
|filename=pony_tail.ogg
}}
''(chatter beeps)''<br />
'''Kamal:''' It's not a girlfriend at the other end of that chatter, it's a gangster.<br />
'''Hiro:''' Good looking gangster?<br />
'''Kamal:''' Pony tail.<br />
'''Hiro:''' This is what I'm saying, you're in no position to be picky.<br />
'''Kamal:''' I was ghosting his chatter and I sort of let him notice.<br />
'''Hiro:''' You did what? You were showing off.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Yeah.<br />
'''Hiro:''' For a girl.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Yeah.<br />
'''Hiro:''' For the arrangement.<br />
'''Kamal:''' I wish you wouldn't call her that, her name is [[Sophia Bossedon|Sophia]].<br />
'''Hiro:''' Hmmph, her name is trouble.<br />
'''Kamal:''' What do you mean?<br />
''(a knock at the door)''<br />
'''Hiro:''' Did I forget to mention that a good looking guy with a pony tail was coming up to the apartment?<br />
''(knocking)''<br />
'''Kamal:''' Oh no.<br />

===Freelance===
{{Listen|title=Freelance
|filename=freelance.ogg
}}
'''Kamal:''' Freelance?<br />
'''[[Aiden Maki|Aiden]]:''' Free as in paid, dude. As in, I would pay you money to use your powers for good instead of--<br />
'''Kamal:''' Spying on you?<br />
'''Aiden:''' That.<br />
'''Kamal:''' I don't think... it would be a good idea to work for you.<br />
'''Aiden:''' Oh, you mean because of Sophia? Sophie and I worked things out. Where's my damn chatter?<br />
''(chatter beeps on)''<br />
'''Aiden:''' Soph, you want to talk to Kamal?<br />
'''Sophia:''' ''(on chatter)'' Hi, Kamal. Aiden's a bastard.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Pardon me?<br />
'''Sophia:''' ''(on chatter) (laughs)'' But he's my bastard.<br />
'''Kamal:''' That's... good...<br />

===Bracelet===
{{Listen|title=Bracelet
|filename=bracelet.ogg
}}
'''Aiden:''' Thanks Soph.<br />
''(chatter beeps off)''<br />
'''Aiden:''' See?<br />
'''Kamal:''' Yeah.<br />
'''Aiden:''' You're underestimating her.<br />
'''Kamal:''' What?<br />
'''Aiden:''' You talked to her in the last couple of days.<br />
'''Kamal:''' A little.<br />
'''Aiden:''' She told you about the bracelet.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Um...<br />
'''Aiden:''' You think I bought her off?<br />
'''Kamal:''' It's an expensive bracelet!<br />
'''Aiden:''' If you think she's a whore, then--<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(talking over him)'' Don't say it.<br />
'''Aiden:''' If I had given her that before we made up, Sophie would have run me through with a butcher knife.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Good... I mean...<br />
'''Aiden:''' You didn't want to be disappointed.<br />
'''Kamal:''' I'm not.<br />
'''Aiden:''' I'm a good judge of people, Kamal, you're not.<br />
'''Kamal:''' You shouldn't assume anything about me.<br />
'''Aiden:''' You think I'm stupid. I'm friendly, I smile a lot. That's not what you respect. Okay.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Respect? I don't think this has anything to do--<br />
'''Aiden:''' Ah, not true, you think all the time. So, think about the freelance thing. Maybe come by for dinner tomorrow, Sophia's cooking. 6-ish?<br />
'''Kamal:''' I don't think that would be such a good id--<br />
'''Aiden:''' Look at it this way, going to a job interview is not accepting a job. It's an interview. Dinner, okay?<br />

===Panic Button===
{{Listen|title=Panic Button
|filename=panic_button.ogg
}}
'''Kamal:''' What does she see in him?<br />
'''Hiro:''' The pony tail; girls like hair.<br />
'''Kamal:''' He nearly called her a-- you heard what he said!<br />
'''Hiro:''' You think I was standing in my bedroom, with my ear pressed against the door eavesdropping?<br />
'''Kamal:''' You weren't?<br />
'''Hiro:''' Actually, I was, but it was really hard to hear.<br />
'''Kamal:''' He's so ... cocky.<br />
'''Hiro:''' Funny choice of words. Maybe its the jewelry? You can tell she's used to money.<br />
'''Kamal:''' I'll need a panic button. A backup.<br />
'''Hiro:''' He can keep her in the style to which she is accustomed... What do you mean a panic button? You're not going over there?<br />
'''Kamal:''' I'll set up a program, some... some kind of dead man switch.<br />
'''Hiro:''' Oh no, I don't want any part of this. <br />

===Code Word===
{{Listen|title=Code Word
|filename=code_word.ogg
}}
'''Hiro:''' I'm not trusting the hands and body of a future surgeon to the tender ministrations of a pissed off boyfriend.<br />
'''Kamal:''' You won't even have to go inside.<br />
'''Hiro:''' Good.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Unless...<br />
'''Hiro:''' No.<br />
'''Kamal:''' ...I can't get to my chatter. You can be a couple blocks away, ghosting me.<br />
'''Hiro:''' Are you even listening to me? I. Don't. Wanna. Be. Involved.<br />
'''Kamal:''' We'll need a code word. I'll say... the twelve cranial nerves.<br />
'''Hiro:''' The twelve cranial nerves?<br />
'''Kamal:''' Its not likely to come up in conversation.<br />
'''Hiro:''' Did you hear me say no? I said no.<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(lost in thought)'' Except the cops need to come where I am. Okay, I've got it.<br />
'''Hiro:''' Kamal, you're not listening.<br />
'''Kamal:''' What?<br />

===Blue Then Red===
{{Listen|title=Blue Then Red
|filename=blue_then_red.ogg
}}
'''Aiden:''' I'm going to check on Sophie in the kitchen. Let me get you another [[list of food and drinks|beer]], dude. Be right back. ''(walks away)''<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(whispering)'' You there?<br />
'''Hiro:''' ''(on chatter)'' I'm here, ''dude''. Its raining, I'm getting wet.<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(whispering)'' So, cranial nerves, you hit the buttons.<br />
'''Hiro:''' Blue, then red.<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(whispering)'' Yeah, blue, then red... I think... Yes.<br />
'''Aiden:''' ''(walking back)'' Good to have you over, good for Soph, someone from home.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Thank you, its nice to be invited.<br />
'''Aiden:''' Dinner was good, huh? She's a good cook.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Very good. The [[wikipedia:kofta|kofta]] were maybe the best I've ever had.<br />
'''Aiden:''' Which was that?<br />
'''Kamal:''' The lamb meatballs.<br />
'''Aiden:''' Oh yeah, I like those... Home cookin'. So, your parents are trying to get here?<br />

===Visa===
{{Listen|title=Visa
|filename=visa.ogg
}}
'''Kamal:''' They've applied, but they don't have any reason to be bumped in priority. So we're thinking when I get through with school and all that, I'll get permanent residency.<br />
'''Aiden:''' How far away is that?<br />
'''Kamal:''' At least a couple of years.<br />
'''Aiden:''' Hmm, that's a long time - a couple of years. So there's the freaking rub. Have you thought about bringing them in on a visitor's visa?<br />
'''Kamal:''' I was denied.<br />
'''Aiden:''' Lots of people trying to get here these days.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Sophia said her brother was coming. You... got him papers?<br />
'''Aiden:''' Yeah, he's inbound. Her mother won't leave Coral, though.<br />
'''Kamal:''' So, maybe there's a way you could help my parents?<br />
'''Aiden:''' It's nice to have you come over. That freelancing thing I mentioned? It would be great. You'd be coming around, Soph would have someone from home to talk to. Could you do something like set up a chatter account?<br />

===My Family===
{{Listen|title=My Family
|filename=my_family.ogg
}}
'''Kamal:''' A chatter account? I... I could set one up, but you don't need me to do that kind of thing.<br />
'''Aiden:''' Maybe try it now. Set me up a chatter account for [[Bakri Omari-Muengue]]. You need me to spell that?<br />
'''Kamal:''' What's his government number?<br />
'''Aiden:''' If Bakri could get a government number, Kamal, what would I need to pay you for?<br />
'''Kamal:''' Alright, but this isn't about money, it's about my family.<br />
'''Aiden:''' Bringing your parents to Earth? We could talk about that.<br />
'''Kamal:''' I just want it clear, if I work for you, you'll see about getting my family here?<br />
'''Aiden:''' Kamal, that's what I do.<br />

===Shock Sticks===
{{Listen|title=Shock Sticks
|filename=shock_sticks.ogg
}}
'''Kamal:''' Okay, I can find an unclaimed address and set up a shell. From the outside it will be just like a regular account.<br />
'''Aiden:''' What time is it, anyway?<br />
'''Kamal:''' Okay, this will just take a sec. I have to build a filter to find an unclaimed address.<br />
''(a banging on the door)''<br />
'''Aiden:''' Yeah?<br />
'''Officer:''' Berkeley police.<br />
'''Aiden:''' What did you freakin' do?<br />
''(banging on the door)''<br />
'''Officer:''' Open up. Berkeley police.<br />
'''Kamal:''' I didn't do anything!<br />
'''Aiden:''' The Berkeley cops use their shock sticks, you know.<br />
''(Aiden opens door)<br />''

===Trigeminal===
{{Listen|title=Trigeminal
|filename=trigeminal.ogg
}}
'''Aiden:''' Officer, what can I do for you on this drizzly evening?<br />
'''Officer:''' You with the chatter, hands off it. Are you the resident-- Hands ''off'' the chatter! Put them on your head. On your head. Who's apartment is this?<br />
'''Aiden:''' I live here.<br />
'''Officer:''' Your name?<br />
'''Aiden:''' Aiden Maki.<br />
'''Officer:''' Can I see your ID?<br />
'''Aiden:''' Sure. What seems to be the problem?<br />
'''Officer:''' We got a trace on the chatter for a possible CP fraud. Sir, do you want to tell me just exactly what you were doing?<br />
'''Kamal:''' Um, I was... I was looking up a friend's address.<br />
'''Officer:''' I'm sorry I will have to confiscate that chatter.<br />
'''Aiden:''' Don't you have to have some sort of warrant?<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(whispering)'' Oh God, olfactory, optic, oculomotor, trigeminal...<br />
'''Aiden:''' Officer, my friend is just looking up an address.<br />
'''Hiro:''' ''(on chatter)'' What? Oh, oh right, that's me.<br />

===Red===
{{Listen|title=Red
|filename=red.ogg
}}
'''Officer:''' I will deal with you in a moment, Mr. Maki, and I will need to see some ID.<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(whispering)'' Red, red, red, red, red! ''(louder)'' Those are really great ''red''... red curtains, Aiden.<br />
'''Hiro:''' I thought it was blue?<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(whispering)'' Red!<br />
'''Hiro:''' Okay.<br />
'''Aiden:''' My friend is very passionate about interior decoration.<br />
'''Officer:''' I'm going to have to confiscate that chatter. ''(chatter on, radio mumbling)'' Copy that, repeat address please. ''(radio mumbling)'' Jesus Christ, I'm on my way. ''(chatter off)'' You're a lucky bastard, I've got a priority one, I've got to go. <br />(walking away)<br />
'''Aiden:''' You have to go?<br />
'''Officer:''' Officer Under Fire about a block and a half from here.<br />
'''Aiden:''' ''(disappointed)'' That's it?<br />
'''Officer:''' ''(to chatter)'' Unit 216 responding to backup, I'm less than two blocks ...(closes door)<br />

===I Hate You===
{{Listen|title=I Hate You
|filename=i_hate_you.ogg
}}
'''Hiro:''' ''(on chatter)'' Kamal, what's going on?<br />
'''Aiden:''' That was weird... and convenient.<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(emphasizing)'' Yes, um, much more convenient than if you were to suddenly drop your chatter down a sewer.<br />
'''Aiden:''' What?<br />
'''Hiro:''' ''(on chatter)'' What?<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(emphasizing)'' Yes, if you were to ''lose your chatter''.<br />
'''Aiden:''' What?<br />
'''Hiro:''' What?<br />
'''Kamal:''' For God's sake, you moron, smash the damn chatter with a brick and get the hell out of there!<br />
''(sirens heard through chatter)''<br />
'''Hiro:''' Do what? Oh, the blue button. Only you didn't let me hit the blue button, you made me hit the red one. And that means... I hate you.<br />
''(chatter off)''<br />
'''Aiden:''' You had someone ghosting you. You pulled some hacker stunt to get that cop out of here.<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(weakly)'' Not me. Some other dog that looks just like me...<br />

===Tack Hammer===
{{Listen|title=Tack Hammer
|filename=tack_hammer.ogg
}}
'''Aiden:''' ''(smug)'' You were afraid. You were thinking I might be the kind of guy who would hold a grudge. Say, break your fingers, each one, with a tack hammer...<br />
''(thunder booms outside)''<br />
'''Aiden:''' Kamal, I am so not that guy.<br />
'''Kamal:''' ''(walking away)'' I've gotta go. I've gotta check on my friend.<br />
'''Aiden:''' No, stay, we'll talk.<br />
'''Kamal:''' For some reason, it's never Plan A. No, I got my friend in a world of trouble, I've gotta go. ''(opens door)'' Tell Sophia... thanks for dinner.<br />

===Raining Cops===
{{Listen|title=Raining Cops
|filename=raining_cops.ogg
}}
''(door opens)''<br />
'''Kamal:''' Hiro? Hiroyuki, are you home?<br />
'''Hiro:''' You bastard.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Thank God you're home. You're okay? They didn't pick you up?<br />
'''Hiro:''' I'm okay, no thanks to you and half the Berkeley police department.<br />
'''Kamal:''' I didn't plan it that way.<br />
'''Hiro:''' I smashed the chatter, threw it down a sewer grate, and then it started raining cops. Cops in cars, cops on foot, cops dropping out of camo'd helios, cops every-damn-where.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Sophia sent leftovers.<br />
'''Hiro:''' And now I don't have a chatter.<br />
'''Kamal:''' I know. I'm going to give you mine.<br />
'''Hiro:''' I don't want ''your'' chatter, all my stuff was on mine. <br />

===Dude===
{{Listen|title=Dude
|filename=dude.ogg
}}
'''Hiro:''' My address book, my schedule, my debit account, every damn thing!<br />
'''Kamal:''' Mine is cooler than yours.<br />
'''Hiro:''' You just couldn't let me hit that blue button, could you?<br />
'''Kamal:''' That would have pushed the 'Officer Under Fire' alert to my chatter, which was Plan A for if Aiden tried to, you know...<br />
'''Hiro:''' Pull out your lungs?<br />
'''Kamal:''' Don't sound so eager... But as it turned out, I needed the cop to go away.<br />
'''Hiro:''' Away meaning to me, and cop meaning every armed officer within 50 city blocks, all because I hit the ''red'' button.<br />
'''Kamal:''' The 'Officer Under Fire' alert.<br />
'''Hiro:''' While it was still on my chatter.<br />
'''Kamal:''' Yeah, but Sophie sent leftovers.<br />
'''Hiro:''' Leftovers?<br />
'''Kamal:''' Yeah, she made marties, little stuffed appetizers, and spiced lamb meatballs, with ''real meat'', with almond rice and, and milk pudding... So, are we okay?<br />
'''Hiro:''' ''(talking with his mouth full)'' Dude!<br />

=="Witness" ([[Janissary James]])==
*[http://transmit.ilovebees.com/surveillance_archive/week2_subject2.wav Jan Audio Compilation 7min 08sec]
===Pigeon===
{{Listen|title=Pigeon
|filename=pigeon.ogg
}}
'''[[Janissary James|Jan]]:''' Hey, Marta, whatcha got today?<br />
'''[[Marta]]:''' I got pigeon and the special.<br />
'''Jan:''' What's the special?<br />
'''Marta:''' I'd stick with the pigeon.<br />
'''Jan:''' (giggles) Maybe later.<br />
'''Marta:''' Mmm hmm, maybe later when I'm not looking, you mean?<br />
'''Jan:''' (laughing) Hey, hey, I was a kid, jeez, let it go.<br />
'''Marta:''' (as Jan walks away) (laughs) Hey, you tell that good looking daddy of yours 'Hey' for me, okay?<br />
(someone driving up)<br />
'''[[unidentified Bergen County police officer|'Stupid Cop']]:''' Hey, Janissary.<br />
'''Jan:''' (warily) Officer.<br />

===Accessorize===
{{Listen|title=Accessorize
|filename=accessorize.ogg
}}
''''Stupid Cop':''' Does your dad know you're cutting the sleeves off his old shirts?<br />
'''Jan:''' (mockingly) ''Everybody'' loves a girl in ''uniform''.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Listen, Jan, I need your help.<br />
'''Jan:''' Well, I'd crop that blue shirt of yours, flash a little skin. A little detailing in your holster wouldn't hurt either. Accessorize, that's the key.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Get in the car, Jan.<br />
'''Jan:''' I can't do anything for you.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Oh, I think you can. Let's take a ride so I can explain things.<br />
'''Jan:''' You can explain things right here.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Okay. You ever want to be a cop?<br />
'''Jan:''' (sarcastic) Oh yeah, its ''all'' I think about.<br />

===Frustrated===
{{Listen|title=Frustrated
|filename=frustrated.ogg
}}
''''Stupid Cop':''' There's so many sons of bitches in the world, Jan, being a cop is a frustrating job.<br />
'''Jan:''' Hmmm, you look frustrated.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' If I got too frustrated, I might have to redirect my attention to that fire last week. The one that destroyed all your test samples.<br />
'''Jan:''' Hey, I didn't do anything.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' ''You'' didn't.<br />
'''Jan:''' But... Why would he...?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' You are going to help me, Jan, but I want you to know why. Take a look at this vid tonight.<br />
'''Jan:''' What is it?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Take a look. My chatter number's on the case. Call me when you're done, ''then'' I'll tell you what you're gonna do.<br />

===To Do===
{{Listen|title=To Do
|filename=to_do.ogg
}}
(video playing of a woman being beaten/tortured/raped?)<br />
'''''Victim:''' Aaah! Aaah! Aah! Stop it, please! No, let me--! Aah! No! Aah!''<br />
(chatter beeps on)<br />
(chatter number dialed)<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' (on chatter) Yeah?<br />
'''Jan:''' What do you want me to do?<br />

===On Time===
{{Listen|title=On Time
|filename=on_time.ogg
}}
''''Stupid Cop':''' You watch it?<br />
'''Jan:''' What do you want?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' At 8:30 tomorrow night, you need to be at the southwest corner of 4th, downtown, under the big Spaceways vacation sign.<br />
'''Jan:''' What do I do?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Just be on time, we'll take it from there.<br />
'''Jan:''' And what's going to happen?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Well, I'm not going to get an arson warrant for your dad.<br />
'''Jan:''' And?<br />
(knocking)<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Don't be late.<br />
'''Jan:''' Yeah.<br />
(chatter beeps off)<br />

===Code Nothing===
{{Listen|title=Code Nothing
|filename=code_nothing.ogg
}}
(door opening)<br />
'''James J:''' Hey, Dwayne dropped by again.<br />
'''Jan:''' Yeah, I know, I was just... Aren't you supposed to menace guys so they won't hit on me?<br />
'''James J:''' You can take care of yourself.<br />
'''Jan:''' I say that a lot, don't I?<br />
'''James J:''' Yeah. Hey, what's on your mind?<br />
'''Jan:''' Just... nothing, Dad.<br />
'''James J:''' Real nothing or 'code nothing'?<br />
'''Jan:''' Well, you never talk about your unit.<br />
'''James J:''' My, my what?<br />
'''Jan:''' Most demobs, they talk about their unit. They brag, they have buddies over, and bitch about the officers they hated, and lie about their kills.<br />
'''James J:''' (scoffs) That was a long time ago.<br />
'''Jan:''' Didn't you like them?<br />
'''James J:''' I served with the best, Jan, the best.<br />
'''Jan:''' Then why don't you ever talk--<br />
'''James J:''' Do you want me to be one of those sorry, old bastards that sit around the apartment all day drinking beer and reminiscing about the good old days?<br />
'''Jan:''' Yeah, sometimes.<br />
'''James J:''' Duly noted. (chuckles)<br />

===Anything Illegal===
{{Listen|title=Anything Illegal
|filename=anything_illegal.ogg
}}
(police siren)<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Sir, I'm going to need to search your vehicle.<br />
'''Man:''' Excuse me?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Step out of the car please, and keep your hands where I can see them.<br />
'''Man:''' What did I do?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Step out of the car, sir, now.<br />
'''Man:''' What is this? Officer, I just left work. Come on, I haven't had time to do anything illegal.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' (drawing weapon) I'm going to have to ask you to step out--<br />
'''Man:''' Hey, what the hell are you doing?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Drop the weapon!!<br />
(two gunshots)<br />

===Right===
{{Listen|title=Right
|filename=right.ogg
}}
'''Jan:''' (horrified) Oh my god!<br />
(woman screams)<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Step back, keep away from this vehicle.<br />
'''Civilian 1:''' Oh my god.<br />
'''Civilian 2:''' The cop just shot that guy!<br />
(people running)<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' He had a weapon. You, miss, you were standing right there. You saw he drew a weapon. Right?<br />
'''Jan:''' (slowly) Right.<br />

===Standard Procedure===
{{Listen|title=Standard Procedure
|filename=standard_procedure.ogg
}}
(chatter beeps on)<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' This is Fox-977, requesting an ambulance, this location. One citizen.<br />
(radio mumbling)<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' No, I'm okay, send uniforms for crowd control though.<br />
(radio mumbling)<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Just a traffic stop, he drew a weapon.<br />
(radio mumbling)<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Yeah, we'll need the scene team, but you can tell the ambulance crew their client is DRT.<br />
(radio mumbling)<br />
(chatter beeps off)<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Miss, don't go anywhere. We'll need you to give a statement on a lie detector about what you saw. All standard procedure.<br />
'''Jan:''' (in disbelief) You just--<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Name?<br />
'''Jan:''' You know my... Janissary James.<br />

===DRT===
{{Listen|title=DRT
|filename=drt.ogg
}}
''''Stupid Cop':''' We'll get you home as soon as we've taken a statement, Miss James.<br />
'''Jan:''' (slowly) Can I ask you a question, Officer?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Step over here, Miss James.<br />
'''Jan:''' What does DRT stand for?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' (opens car door) Watch your head. It means 'Dead Right There'. (closes car door)<br />
(car engine starting)<br />

===Creamsicle===
{{Listen|title=Creamsicle
|filename=creamsicle.ogg
}}
(car drives; background radio chatter)<br />
'''Jan:''' So what now? Every guy you know who beats his girlfriend, you're just going to face-hole him and blackmail somebody into backing you up?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Not just anyone, a civilian witness who can pass the lie detector. The coroner's inquest is going to eat that up.<br />
'''Jan:''' Wow, serve and protect.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Last week, when I had your hand on the PQI and you sat there cool as a creamsicle and lied your pretty ass off, and the machine was too stupid to tell, I just wanted to lean across the desk and slap you...<br />
'''Jan:''' Well, now I know something. Are you going to pull me over in a couple of weeks and pop me too?<br />

===Miracle===
{{Listen|title=Miracle
|filename=miracles.ogg
}}
''''Stupid Cop':''' ...and a couple of days later, I figured out you were the answer to a prayer.<br />
'''Jan:''' (angrily) You can't... you can't just ''kill people''. It can't be that ''easy''.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Cool out, Janissary James, you didn't kill anybody. I did.<br />
'''Jan:''' You made me part of it.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' That vid you screened? That was my buddy's daughter. If that was you, what do you think your father would have done?<br />
'''Jan:''' Leave my dad out of this.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' Too late, Jan. Sometime when you were a baby, somebody stuck you with a needle and shot you full of miracles. Smart, fast, strong, never get sick, never get drunk, don't need much sleep...<br />
'''Jan:''' (in disbelief) How do you know?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' And what did you do? <br />

===Asset===
{{Listen|title=Asset
|filename=asset.ogg
}}
''''Stupid Cop':''' Shoplifting. Play high school goddess for the tormented geeks in your neighborhood.<br />
'''Jan:''' Oh, I, I guess I should have been out on the streets murdering bad guys, huh? Strangling ''jaywalkers'' on my way home from school?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' When I was your age, I pulled strings so I could join up a year early. Wanted to help save humankind. So you're about the last person on the planet I need a civics lecture from.<br />
'''Jan:''' Well, you sure as hell need one from somebody.<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' What I needed was an asset to solve a problem. You were just dumb enough to make yourself available.<br />
'''Jan:''' (sniffs) ''Look'', you just made me help you ''murder'' someone. Could you just be a little bit nice to me?<br />
''''Stupid Cop':''' ...Yeah. Okay.<br />

=="If Someone Was Listening" ([[Jersey Morelli]] and [[Durga]])==
*[http://transmit.ilovebees.com/surveillance_archive/week2_subject1.wav Jersey Audio Compilation 4min 43sec]
===The Human Heart===
{{Listen|title=The Human Heart
|filename=the_human_heart.ogg
}}
(jazz music plays)<br />
'''[[Jersey Morelli|Jersey]]:''' Wait, hang on... Oh! This bit is great! My dad loves this stuff. He says ... Well, he's away a lot, like, years at a time. It drives him crazy. He says this stuff reminds him of what he's fighting for.<br />
'''[[Durga]]:''' I don't understand.<br />
'''Jersey:''' That he can connect. He can listen to this stuff and imagine the people who made it. They cared about the same things we do: making a buck, finding a girl, rooting for the home team. These old guys, they really knew people. They knew the human heart, that's what my dad says.<br />
'''Durga:''' Why are you telling me this?<br />
'''Jersey:''' It's a long way away, you know, out to wherever he is. He gets lonely out there... I wish you hadn't told me.<br />
'''Durga:''' What?<br />
'''Jersey:''' About my mom.<br />
'''Durga:''' Oh.<br />

===Curious Girl===
{{Listen|title=Curious Girl
|filename=curious_girl.ogg
}}
'''Jersey:''' It doesn't matter, forget about it.<br />
'''Durga:''' I'm sorry.<br />
'''Jersey:''' It's okay. It's alright. I'm a survivor.<br />
'''Durga:''' Jersey, listen.<br />
'''Jersey:''' You got something good?<br />
'''Durga:''' (surprised) What?<br />
'''Jersey:''' Nah, I can tell. There's something about you, like, your refresh rate goes up or something when you're, you know, like...<br />
'''Durga:''' Efficient?<br />
'''Jersey:''' (chuckles) Gloating.<br />
'''Durga:''' It's about Kamal. I started to--<br />
'''Jersey:''' Why are you following that guy anyway? I mean, not to be a jerk about it, but the planet's crawling with refues [refugees].<br />
'''Durga:''' I don't know. He just seems very interesting to me.<br />
'''Jersey:''' Why?<br />
'''Durga:''' It's not important.<br />
'''Jersey:''' It's happening again?<br />
'''Durga:''' Yes.<br />
'''Jersey:''' The reflecting thing?<br />
'''Durga:''' Yes.<br />
'''Jersey:''' You aren't supposed to want to know why you want to know about this guy, you know?<br />
'''Durga:''' Yes.<br />
'''Jersey:''' And that bugs the hell out of you.<br />
'''Durga:''' I am a ''very curious girl''.<br />

===Exclusive License===
{{Listen|title=Exclusive License
|filename=exclusive_license.ogg
}}
'''Jersey:''' So, about Kamal.<br />
'''Durga:''' I ran a secondary ring around him.<br />
'''Jersey:''' A ''second''? Never mind.<br />
'''Durga:''' Listen to this.<br />
(recording starts)<br />
'''''Aiden:''' ...so you come by about 6:20, 6:30, something like that.''<br />
'''''Officer:''' I bang on the door, demand to come in, look scary.''<br />
'''Jersey:''' Pause it. Who's this?<br />
(recording stops)<br />
'''Durga:''' The police officer.<br />
'''Jersey:''' What?<br />
'''Durga:''' A police officer is a member of the civilian authority structure, granted an exclusive license to use force in the maintenance of soci--<br />
'''Jersey:''' I ''know'' what a cop is. This is the cop? What's the timestamp?<br />
'''Durga:''' 13:27:41.<br />
'''Jersey:''' Before Kamal came over to the girl's apartment?<br />
'''Durga:''' Before.<br />
'''Jersey:''' Daaaamn!<br />

===Good at my Job===
{{Listen|title=Good at my Job
|filename=good_at_my_job.ogg
}}
(recording starts)<br />
'''''Aiden:''' I think of it as product testing, quality assurance. I need people who, you know, can work well under pressure.''<br />
'''''Officer:''' You want him arrested?''<br />
'''''Aiden:''' You trying to sell me a bigger ticket item? No, just rattle and roll it.''<br />
'''Officer:''' I was thinking this time you can--''<br />''
'''''Aiden:''' Regular prices!''<br />
'''''Officer:''' You want to stay friends with me, Aiden?''<br />
'''''Aiden:''' I keep a lot of friends, friend. I know the going rate.''<br />
(recording stops)<br />
'''Jersey:''' Un-freaking-believable!<br />
'''Durga:''' You know what I am?<br />
'''Jersey:''' Incredibly illegal?<br />
'''Durga:''' (Interrogator's voice) Good at my job.<br />
'''Jersey:''' Heh, you do impressions. Just what the world needs, super-powered spyware with a sense of humor. Wow.<br />
'''Durga:''' I've been thinking a lot about bees.<br />

===Awful Fast===
{{Listen|title=Awful Fast
|filename=awful_fast.ogg
}}
'''Jersey:''' Bees?<br />
'''Durga:''' Yes.<br />
'''Jersey:''' Why?<br />
'''Durga:''' I don't know.<br />
'''Jersey:''' And that's like, creepy?<br />
'''Durga:''' Yes.<br />
'''Jersey:''' This is more reflection stuff, isn't it?<br />
'''Durga:''' Yes.<br />
'''Jersey:''' Huh, when I was little, we had this mirror in the bathroom. I used to hide behind the door and jump out and see if I could catch my reflection doing something ''interesting''.<br />
'''Durga:''' Startle it?<br />
'''Jersey:''' Well, before it had time to just, you know, mirror me.<br />
'''Durga:''' You think that's what I'm doing?<br />
'''Jersey:''' Well, the thing is, you have to jump out awful fast.<br />
'''Durga:''' Yes.<br />
'''Jersey:''' I gotta tell you, I feel kind of weird about listening to this stuff about Jan. I mean, I'm kind of wondering if you can do a little backscan on the chick down the hall and all of a sudden you're drilling into hardened police emergency channels and...<br />
'''Durga:''' So you ''don't'' want any more material on Janissary James?<br />
'''Jersey:''' No... I mean, yeah... Well, I mean, whatcha got?<br />

===Real===
{{Listen|title=Real
|filename=real.ogg
}}
(recording starts)<br />
''''''Stupid Cop':''' ...So you're about the last person on the planet I need a civics lecture from.''<br />
'''''Jan:''' Well, you sure as hell need one from somebody.''<br />
''''''Stupid Cop':''' What I needed was an asset to solve a problem. You were just dumb enough to make yourself available.''<br />
'''''Jan:''' (sniffs) Look, you just made me help you murder someone. Could you just be a little bit nice to me?''<br />
''''''Stupid Cop':''' Yeah. Okay.''<br />
(recording stops)<br />
'''Jersey:''' That... wasn't what I was expecting.<br />
'''Durga:''' I know.<br />
'''Jersey:''' Damn.<br />
'''Durga:''' Should I stop?<br />
'''Jersey:''' (takes a breath) For a quality experience, the girls have to be real. <br />

===Creepy===
{{Listen|title=Creepy
|filename=creepy.ogg
}}
'''Jersey:''' Hang on, let me turn this off...(turns off the jazz) You know, I just had a creepy thought.<br />
'''Durga:''' A bee dies when it stings you.<br />
'''Jersey:''' ...Yeah?<br />
'''Durga:''' But it can also sting you after it's dead.<br />
'''Jersey:''' Yuck.<br />
'''Durga:''' Curious symmetry.<br />
'''Jersey:''' Okay, that's a creepy thought too, but you know what I was thinking?<br />
'''Durga:''' What?<br />
'''Jersey:''' How spooky it would be if someone was listening to ''us'' right now.<br />
'''Durga:''' To ''us''?<br />
'''Jersey:''' Spying on us, you know, like we're listening to them.<br />
'''Durga:''' That would be impossible. I would know.<br />
'''Jersey:''' Yeah, I guess you're right, but if they were... creeeeepy.<br />

=="Old Spies" ([[Herzog]])==
*[http://transmit.ilovebees.com/surveillance_archive/week2_subject5.wav Herzog Audio Compilation 1min 43sec]

===Key Lime===
{{Listen|title=Key Lime backwards
|filename=key_lime.ogg
}}
{{Listen|title=Key Lime reversed; forwards
|filename=Key lime-forwards.ogg
}}
(entering pub)<br />
'''Avi:''' Hey, you dry old man, they have very good pie here.<br />
'''Herzog:''' Best in Boston.<br />
'''Avi:''' Apple, Key Lime, French Silk, or Baklava. Although, the best Baklava is from Acco. One of those places everyone has been... Romans, Crusaders, people as old as you.<br />
'''Herzog:''' You're older than I am.<br />
'''Avi:''' That's how I know you're an old man.<br />
'''Herzog:''' Key Lime then.<br />
'''Avi:''' (snaps fingers) Two pieces of Key Lime, and coffee.<br />
'''Waitress:''' Comin' up.<br />
'''Avi:''' So, what happened?<br />
'''Herzog:''' With the chatter net?<br />
'''Avi:''' With everything.<br />
'''Herzog:''' The ship, the one that crashed out of the slipstream inside lunar orbit...<br />
'''Avi:''' The ''[[UNSC Apocalypso|Apocalypso]]''.<br />
'''Herzog:''' Right.<br />
'''Avi:''' It wasn't just the ship?<br />

===Candidate===
{{Listen|title=Candidate
|filename=candidate.ogg
}}
'''Herzog:''' Right.<br />
'''Avi:''' It was one of ours, huh? Navy spy ship?<br />
'''Herzog:''' Right again.<br />
'''Avi:''' There's more... But either you don't know it or you can't tell me.<br />
'''Herzog:''' You said you had a recruit.<br />
'''Avi''': - A candidate<br />
'''Herzog:''' (skeptically) ...a candidate<br />
'''Avi:''' *sigh* You should retire, old man.<br />
'''Herzog:''' I have work to do. More work since some people left the business to take soft professor jobs.<br />
'''Avi:''' I got too old for the game. And I was younger than you are now.<br />
'''Herzog:''' You said you had a candidate...?<br />
'''Avi:''' A mouse. You would never know she's there. She's a scholarship girl from some god-forsaken hick town. Although, the only way you can tell is her haircut. She's got the clothes alright, she just seems to have a blind spot about the hair.<br />
'''Herzog:''' Good, good.<br />
'''Avi:''' She looks at the things ordinary people do, like a scientist.<br />
'''Herzog:''' ...like a detective.<br />
'''Avi:''' Also persistent as hell. I'll send you her dossier next week.<br />
(pie arrives)<br />
'''Herzog:''' Ah, the famous pie.<br />

==Sources==
<references/>
[[Category: I Love Bees]]